CT Child Custody: Fighting a Restraining Order

If a family, household member, or someone you are dating is subjecting you to continuous threats of physical pain or physical injury, stalking, or a pattern of threats, a family court judge can grant a restraining order. A restraining order is a court order telling the person to STAY AWAY and STOP hurting you. Many victims believe threats must be followed by a physical act or pain. Not necessarily. A threat may be depriving someone of basic necessities; controlling your movements; threats about their immigration status; or threats relating to sexual conduct, sexual orientation, or releasing sexual images. In each case, the family court takes these incidents into consideration during a child custody dispute. Family courts also recognize when a restraining order is being used to alienate, weaponize, or give ammunition to a complicated dispute.

Connecticut Legal Framework

Connecticut law requires judges to consider domestic violence in child custody decisions because the order itself becomes a part of the custody record. A judge must evaluate any history of domestic or family violence. Consideration is given to the safety concerns of both the child and parent. The judge may look at continuous manipulative or aggressive behavior, and most importantly, the child’s best interests.

Best Interest of the Child

Whenever a Connecticut court is rendering a child custody decision, it follows the “best interest of the child” standard. A judge will consider a child’s safety and either parent’s ability to provide a stable environment and whether the abusive parent poses a future risk or whether the current violence will continue to escalate. During more serious disputes, Connecticut law creates a rebuttable presumption about awarding the abusive parent custody when there is documented abuse or a conviction of other violent crimes. While this presumption can be overcome, the alleged abusive parent has the burden of proving to the court he/she does not pose a current/future safety risk.

When Restraining Orders Can Hurt or Help a Custody Case

Hurt

Judges have witnessed parents who file restraining orders as a strategy to gain custody of the child. This improper use of the judicial system is not tolerated. Judges can spot suspicious timing, vague or hard to verify allegations, or evidence of coaching. Restraining orders that detail angry text messages, unpleasant child exchanges, or normal parenting/divorce hostility, do not warrant restraining orders and judges are keen to note a parent’s manipulative or unreasonable behaviors.

Help

A legitimate restraining order demonstrates a parent’s ability to prioritize the family’s safety and wellbeing. It provides the parent an ability to take appropriate actions whenever necessary. A proper restraining order creates boundaries and sets consequences for the abusive parents for violations. When a legitimate restraining order is presented to the judge, the judge can create a workable custody arrangement. In the event, the abusive parent violates the restraining order, it demonstrates the parent’s inability to respect custody boundaries.

FAQ

What is the difference between a restraining order and a criminal protective order?

A restraining order is ordered by a Family Court judge and issued for only certain people like a person in your immediate family. The restraining order can last longer than a protective order.

A protective order is issued after an arrest in the criminal court. A protective order only lasts if the criminal case exists and may not extend to children.

Who does the restraining order protect?

• A spouse or ex-spouse.
• Parent, child, or another relative.
• Someone who you previously lived with or have a child with even if you’ve never lived together.
• Ex-partner.
• Caretaker who is +60 years old and providing shelter.

After I file the restraining order, is it automatically granted?

No, not necessarily. A judge will review the application to determine whether there are legitimate grounds to enforce the restraining order. Regardless of whether relief is granted, there will be a hearing within one to two weeks where both parties may explain to the Connecticut court why the order should be entered or not.

What happens at a restraining order hearing?

A restraining order hearing is basically a trial. The applicant, the person filed the restraining order, has the burden of proving by preponderance of the evidence, why the applicant needs the restraining order to be effectuated. The respondent, the person who the restraining order is against, shall articulate why the restraining order should not be entered. The rules of the court do still apply, that’s why it’s important to have a Connecticut attorney to argue the matter.

Can a restraining order help me get custody?

A genuine restraining order where it details actual, real abuse can strengthen a person’s position. A judge places higher regard to domestic violence among spouses and children. Yet, petty claims used for tactical positioning are given high scrutiny as well.

How will a restraining order affect the Court’s decision for child custody?

If the order is still active, it will affect the overall decision. If the order is not active, it remains relevant to the underlying decision for future modification.

Disclaimer: This blog is for informational purposes only and should not be construed as legal advice. Consult with Hodgson Law Firm, PLLC for legal guidance regarding your specific situation.